Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Still Not a Grown Up!

You know, one would think that the whole, “changing careers and moving to Texas” thing might indicate some movement towards, I don’t know, maturity? I mean, I will now have to wear suits and heeled shoes to work, and am probably going to have to actually drive myself to work every day. Which I have avoided for years, not just because I hate to drive but also because that makes it extremely difficult to go to happy hour after work and drink until you forget your name. But I digress.

The point is, career change, move, serious relationship, and y’all? I am digressing.

I am thrilled that we have had Weather, and that Weather has caused the cancellation of things work and school related, mainly because I have all sorts of things that need to get done in order for myself to function in the world. Unfortunately, the juxtaposition of work and school means that basic, simple necessities do not ever get done because all day long I am trapped in buildings where all I can do is surf the internet.

Take clothing, for example. All week I have looked like a model for a losing designer on Project Runway because the dry cleaner is holding all of my clothing hostage. (Well, perhaps they have a reason to, seeing as how I have neither gone to pick up the laundry nor paid them for the laundry.) But see, here is the problem. As I grow older and (in theory) more mature, I have bought clothing that reflects a capable, professional attitude. Unfortunately, that clothing cannot be washed by me. So finally, by taking a day off of work two weeks ago, I managed to do laundry, and fill a basket with roughly 90% of what I own to be taken to the cleaners around the corner. This clothing would probably have sat in the basket, mocking me, for weeks had I not had a fortuitous bout with stupidity, in which I brought the wrong textbooks to the Jokers and rather than go home at lunch to get the right books (it was SEVEN DEGREES, PEOPLE) I just skipped class altogether. However, it was not a total loss, in that I did force myself to carry the armful of laundry across the apartment complex IN the seven degree weather and give it to the nice cleaner. (Also, the dry cleaner is next to the store that sells wine.)

That was over a week ago.

Of course, Joker and I forgot to get the clothing on Saturday, so I have been forced to wear… interesting outfits all week. For example, in the last three days I have sported:

Pants with a high waist and front pleats. (No, I do not have even the faintest idea why I own these).

Pants that are 6 sizes too big and make me appear to be playing dress up in my mothers pajamas,

and, my personal favorite,

Pants that I thought were JUST FINE, thanks, until I looked down at work and saw the GIANT HOLE IN THE CROTCH.

Classy, I know.

Or take yesterday. Again, we got out of work early, so having some time on my hands, I decided to stop at the store to procure some food. Lately the Joker and I have been trying that a little, making dinner instead of eating things with names like “popcorn chicken” and “cheesy bites.” See? Adult! However, I was having trouble putting together meal options, and then it occurred to me- most adults do not do the bulk of their food shopping at Rite Aid.

Sigh.

However, the other thing that I did manage to do yesterday is finally clean the bathroom. Now, I am maybe a little anal when it comes to the bathroom, in that I am very big on the disinfectant. I mean, my room? I hardly eat in there, so I am not worried about disinfecting it, although I do like to vacuum it once in awhile. But the bathroom? Things happen in there, things which are by nature… icky. So I try to make sure that pretty much every square inch of my bathroom is covered in bleach at least every few weeks (with spot cleaning in between.) To the extent that in the 4 or so months I have been living there, I have actually bleached out the toilet seat. But, hey, clean!

So the other day I was thinking about Thursday, and how I have no class and the Joker is not coming over and my paper will finally be finished. And I thought, self, that sounds like a great night for a relaxing bubble bath with some nice champagne and a girly novel. And then I looked at the bathroom and thought, GAH! Because there was no way in hell I could relax in a room in that state of… well, it wasn’t a pretty state. So when I came home yesterday I changed into clothes I could not ruin with bleach and about 30 minutes, one rag, one new toilet scrubber, one knocked off sink bottom (oops), and about half a bottle of cleaner later, my bathroom was bubble bath worthy.

So I may be a fashion reject with no who grocery shops at a drug store, but at least I have a clean bathroom.

Addendum.

Ok. So it’s Valentine’s Day. This is a sore subject for a lot of people, everything from the rejection of a corporate consumerist holiday to feelings of inadequacy or sadness if you do not have a partner. I don’t know about any of that. I have never really cared one way or another about Valentine’s Day, except that there is chocolate and- single or in pairs- it’s a damn good excuse to drink champagne. And I am always a fan of a damn good excuse to drink champagne.

However, I do have to say that I very much look forward to getting dressed up and eating out with the Joker at our favorite restaurant tonight, and coming home to curl up in bed to our favorite TV shows. And I will enjoy my presents, because, well, first of all, who doesn’t like presents? (I, for one? Like presents). But not because it’s Valentine’s Day and I have gifts and plans to prove to everyone that I am worth something. Instead, because every gift the Joker gives me is something that reaffirms that he is listening, that he knows me, that he thinks about me and cares. It’s not a “Valentine’s” day gift, or even a Christmas gift or anniversary gift, it is a gift from him to me, that reflects both our personalities and just happens to be exchanged on a given day.

Further proof that while the day doesn’t matter, the guy sure does.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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